The idea of the Coach Approach or building the habit of asking Powerful Questions whenever possible is applicable to most of the interactions in our lives. They lead to more meaningful conversations and deeper relationships. Sometimes it is easiest to understand by seeing them in practice. Here are a few scenarios and how we might use Powerful Questions to either get to know someone, build a deeper relationship, or help others to grow.

Scenario #1 – Powerful Questions in Action in Business Leadership

The most effective leaders are excellent coaches. Rather than giving commands or providing answers, they look for opportunities to ask questions. For example, when a team member comes looking for a solution, a leader might ask, “What alternatives have you already considered? Are there any other solutions that you might consider? What are the pros and cons of the alternatives that you have identified? What do you think is the best solution?” By asking questions, a leader helps team members develop their thinking process and decision-making skills. Seeing them at work helps the leader evaluate their potential and their developmental needs.

The concept of an annual performance review with scripted questions is the antithesis of a leader/follower relationship. Instead, we might have a periodic progress review conversation, which might open with questions such as the following:

• What do you find most challenging about…..
• What are your hopes or dreams for the future? How can we help you achieve them?
• What do you find most irritating about my leadership style or the way that I interact with people?
• What do you see as goals for the next year?

Scenario #2 – Powerful Questions in Action at a Networking Event

Typically, we are meeting new people at a networking event. Some people settle for questions that seek name, where they live, what they do, etc. If we actually want to learn about this person, we are better served by asking questions, perhaps not as deep as we might ask a friend, but still questions that help us see a bit of who this new acquaintance is. These could be questions such as:

• What led to you attending this event?
• What are you hoping to get out of today?
• What part of the presentation did you find…..
• How will what you heard today impact your life?

Or a general question like:

• What is your most prized possession and why?
• If you were to give yourself a nickname, what would it be?
• What are you doing to make the world a better place?