Tag: Powerful questions

150 Great Coaching Questions

One of the best descriptors of a coaching relationship is the analogy of a stagecoach – a coach helps a person move from where they are to where they want to be. As a coach, we help the client make that movement through the combination of powerful listening and asking powerful questions. Through these two skills, the client discovers answers or direction within themselves that lead to the desired movement.

 

Coaches most often establish a relationship with a client in which, over time and through several sessions together, the client develops a plan and takes action to achieve the goal that he/she has established for the coaching relationship. Often, we use the G.R.O.W. model to guide the coaching relationship through the process of establishing a Goal for growth or change, examining the Realities around this goal and the process, exploring some Options that the client might use to grow or change, and then defining the Way (some call it Will) that the client chooses to pursue this growth or change.

Below are 150 questions that provide examples of the types of questions that a coach might use within the coaching relationship, to help the client discover and define a plan for growth or change. Every coaching relationship is a little bit different, so these questions need to be tailored to the coach, the client, and the nature of the relationship.

The coaching relationship generally extends over a number of sessions together. While we often use the G.R.O.W. model to guide the overall relationship, the client also sets goals for each coaching session and defines actions to be pursued between sessions. This first set of questions are some examples that might be used at the beginning of each coaching session.

  • How was your week, two weeks, month?
  • What’s on your mind today?
  • How have you grown this week?
  • What did you learn?
  • What are you grateful for?
  • What did you accomplish this week?
  • Of the actions we talked about last time, what did you accomplish?
  • What progress have you made towards your goal for our coaching relationship?
  • What would you like to focus on for our conversation?
  • What is the biggest issue on your mind today/this week?
  • Based on the amount of time we have together today, what would be your ideal outcome from our conversation?
  • What would you like to have achieved by the end of this session?
  • What would you like to take away from our conversation?
  • How can our session today help you with the current challenges you are facing?

Once the session moves into coaching, the first session(s) are most likely focused on defining the Goal for the coaching relationship. Questions regarding the Goal might look like the following:

  • What do you want to get from this coaching relationship?
  • What is your current biggest problem or challenge?
  • What’s missing in your life right now?
  • What would you like more of in your life?
  • What would you like less of?
  • What is your desired outcome or goal?
  • What’s the real challenge here for you?
  • What is it specifically that you want to achieve?
  • What would it look like if you were entirely successful?
  • Describe your ideal outcome from this coaching…
  • What would you like to happen that is not happening now, or what would you like not to happen that is happening now?
  • Why are you hoping to achieve this goal? What is the deeper meaning or personal significance that this goal has for you?
  • What do you want to achieve long term?
  • When do you want to achieve it by?
  • What will change if you achieve this goal?
  • Help me understand why this change is particularly meaningful to you.
  • Describe this goal or challenge a bit more…
  • What positive things do you feel will happen if you accomplish what you’re trying to achieve?
  • If you don’t change this, what will it cost you in the long run?
  • How would your life be transformed if you changed this right now?
  • What does success look like?
  • What do you imagine it would look like if you could accomplish this?
  • How will you know if you have achieved your goal?
  • How long have you been thinking about this goal? What are some of the thoughts that you have had about this?
  • What’s important to you about that outcome or result?
  • Is this goal pulling you forward or are you struggling to reach it?
  • Is that positive, challenging, attainable?
  • What would be your next goal after you achieve your current one?
  • What’s the bigger picture?

Once a Goal has been defined (or at least a first version of one), coaching moves on to examining the Realities of the situation. Here are some sample questions that demonstrate what this phase of the coaching relationship might look like:

  • What’s the current situation?
  • How would you like it to be?
  • What’s your biggest obstacle to achieving this goal?
  • What have you tried?
  • What will happen if you don’t take this step?
  • What is in your control?
  • What’s standing in your way?
  • What’s the cost of not taking action?
  • What’s the benefit of taking action?
  • What’s getting in the way of your progress?
  • What will things look like after you’ve been successful?
  • What’s worked for you in the past?
  • When have you been successful in a similar situation in the past?
  • What did you do to make it successful?
  • How does this affect the people around you?
  • Are you focused on what’s wrong or what’s right?
  • How long have you been thinking about this?
  • What’s stopping you from taking action?
  • What will you have to give up in order to make room for your goals?
  • What qualities/resources do you have to help you?
  • What are the internal/external obstacles?
  • What’s the downside of your dream?
  • What’s the benefit of this problem?
  • What strengths can you utilize in making this change?
  • How can you turn this around and have better results next time?
  • What does your intuition tell you about this?
  • Have you ever experienced something like this before?
  • What are some ways this challenge is impacting you or others?
  • What can you learn from this situation?
  • Do you have a gut feeling about this?
  • How do the key principles and priorities you live by apply here?
  • If you could start over again, what would you do differently?
  • What specific events led you to that conclusion?
  • What are you doing to not achieve your goal?
  • If your main obstacle didn’t exist, how would your life look?

As the client comes to more fully understand the Realities of the situation, she/he is equipped with the information to begin exploring the Options that might exist for moving toward the goal. The coach might use questions such as the following to assist in that process.

  • What do you see as the first step to accomplishing your goal?
  • Are there any steps you could take right away that would significantly improve your situation?
  • What might you do to take you closer after that?
  • Can you think of some alternatives? Is there another way?
  • Who might you ask for help? Who else?
  • What are the pros and cons of this option?
  • Which possible pathway do you feel prepared to go down?
  • What would you do if time/money/resources weren’t an issue?
  • What has worked for you in the past when it comes to situations like this?
  • How might you draw on that same approach in this case?
  • Tell me about the resources that would be helpful? How or where might you acquire those?
  • What might your family or friends suggest that you do?
  • If a friend were in your shoes, what advice would you give them?
  • How would you tackle this if time wasn’t a factor?
  • What option appeals to you most right now?
  • Imagine you had no barriers, what would that look like?
  • What else could you do?
  • Think of someone you respect. How would she/he handle this situation?
  • What haven’t you considered that might have an impact?
  • What resources do you need?
  • What would you have to believe for this option to be right?
  • What’s the worst that can happen, and can you handle that?
  • How can you solve this problem so it never comes back?
  • How can you learn what you need to know about this?
  • Is this the best option you can imagine or is there something greater?
  • Which step could you take that would make the biggest difference, right now?
  • What fears or inner drives are influencing your response? How could you remove those things from the equation so you can make a better decision?
  • Tell me what you think would happen if you tried doing that?
  • How might you broaden your current line of thinking?
  • What has worked for you already? How could you do more of that?
  • What’s the best/worst thing about that option?
  • What are the pros/cons of pursuing each option? Which is most advantageous?
  • What would it cost in terms of time and resources to do this? What would it cost if you don’t do this? What’s the cost if you don’t decide or let circumstances overtake you?
  • What decision would best align with your faith? What is God saying to you on this?
  • What will really make the biggest difference here?
  • If you weren’t scared, what would you do?
  • What might make the difference that could change everything?

After exploring Options, the client should be ready to choose or define a specific action plan (the Way) with milestones and target dates for moving forward. Here are some sample questions for the Way (or Will) phase of coaching:

  • Which opportunity or option are you going to pursue?
  • What is a first step you can take?
  • What are the steps you’re going to take? What’s the very first thing you will do?
  • What are the next three steps? What else?
  • What specific actions will you take to achieve your goal? What is your time frame?
  • Have you decided to take action or are you just hoping you will?
  • What are you willing to commit to here?
  • Who do you have to support you or hold you accountable?
  • What support do you need to get that done?
  • When precisely are you going to start and finish each action step?
  • How might you turn these steps into a plan?
  • Who needs to know what your plans are?
  • What will you do now?
  • When will you do it?
  • How specifically will you know you’ve completed that action/goal?
  • What could arise to hinder you in taking these steps?
  • What personal resistance do you have, if any, to taking these steps?
  • What will you do to eliminate these external and internal factors?
  • What support do you need and from whom?
  • What will you do to obtain that support and when?
  • What roadblocks do you expect or that require planning?
  • Have you considered the potential barriers?
  • Tell me how you plan to overcome these obstacles…
  • What commitment on a 1-to-10 scale do you have to taking these agreed actions?
  • What prevents this from being a 10?
  • What could you do or alter to raise this commitment closer to 10?
  • What does this accomplishment mean to you?
  • How will you celebrate that?
  • To what extent does this meet all your objectives?
  • Is there anything missing?

At the end of each coaching session, the coach needs to check in with the client to assure that they are both on track and that the client is achieving his/her expectations for the coaching relationship. The client should also have a set of action steps to accomplish prior to the next coaching session. The wrap-up to each coaching session might use questions like the following:

  • Is there anything else you want to talk about now or are we finished?
  • What was your biggest win of the session today?
  • What actions do you plan to take in preparation for our next session?
  • Are there any other actions that would be helpful before we next meet?
  • What was most useful for you?
  • What’s been your major learning, insight, or discovery so far?
  • Are there any important questions that have not been asked?
  • What had real meaning for you from what you’ve spoken about? What surprised you? What challenged you?

As mentioned earlier, these are simply examples of the types of questions that might be used in a coaching relationship. Some of these might easily fit into different phases of the G.R.O.W. model or a coach might prefer some other model for guiding the conversation, still using similar questions.

The important thing to remember in coaching is that the coach’s responsibility is to practice powerful listening that leads to powerful questions. The coach’s role is to use questions like these to assist the client in drawing out the thoughts, hopes, dreams, fears, etc. that play a part in the client’s understanding and moving forward.

What other questions do you find effective in coaching others?

A Case Study in the Value of Powerful Questions

“Good leaders ask good questions. The best leaders ask the best questions.”

Effective leaders spend much of their time coaching the people around them. They see the value that asking questions provides as they empower people and help in their development.

A friend recently told me about his experience as he began to use powerful questions in leadership. One of the people on his team had sent a message to the effect, “We need a decision on this.” As he related this to me, it seemed almost like an ultimatum and that she was clearly laying the responsibility on him. Since he and I had discussed The Power in Powerful Questions just days earlier, he opted out of his normal pattern of providing a quick decision.

Instead, he paused a couple of minutes and wrote a reply that contained a few questions. He didn’t tell me precisely what those questions were, but they probably went like this: “What do we need to accomplish through this decision?”, What are some of the alternatives that you have already considered and are there others that we should think about?”, “What are the major issues that we face in making this decision?” Knowing my friend, he probably ended his note with a clear and positive statement, such as, “I hope these questions are helpful as you formulate your recommended decision.”

A few days went by without a reply from the team member, and my friend began to have second thoughts. Having stepped out of his normal pattern, what was she thinking? Perhaps she was thinking that he was shirking his responsibility of making all the decisions, or maybe that he was hanging her out to dry on this particularly difficult decision, or that their relationship had been fractured for some reason. A few more days went by and he received a reply that both pleased and surprised him.

Her reply to his questions, which were in place of a quick decision, began with this statement, “Thank you for not making this decision but rather empowering and encouraging me to make a recommendation.” She then laid out the decision that she thought they should make along with the logic that supported it. As he read her recommended decision, he realized that it was much better than any decision that he would have thought of in this case. Being the person closest to this decision and responsible for its implementation, she had the most knowledge and the best perspective. Therefore, with some encouragement, she was able to reach the best decision.

By asking a few powerful questions, my friend had empowered the team member to think deeply and reach a great decision. As this pattern continues, she will no doubt be more satisfied and enthusiastic about her job responsibilities. And, with continued practice and coaching, she will grow in her ability to analyze situations and make decisions. And, by having the responsibility for both the decision and the implementation, she is now highly motivated to make it happen successfully. She is fully bought in.

Many people, when they reach a position of leadership, think that their knowledge and ability to make decisions got them there and that, as the leader, they are now responsible for making most, if not all, decisions. This could not be further from the truth. The most effective leaders make few decisions. They are responsible for the quality of decisions but one of the greatest purposes of leadership is to develop the people around them. To do so, requires asking the powerful questions that “sharpen the saw” for people in the organization so that those closest to the implementation are prepared and able to make those good decisions.

As a leader, are you more likely to make decisions or to ask the questions that help others think and decide well? Do you view this delegating of decision-making as losing your power or empowering others? Which of these, your power or empowering others, is more important to you?

Larry King – Questioner Extraordinaire

Larry King, the radio and television host and interviewer, earned his living and his reputation by asking questions. And not just simple questions, but often powerful questions. He was less interested in the facts than he was in the person. With his death this past week at the age of 87, it is interesting to look back at some of his thoughts on interviewing, listening, and asking questions. Here are a few quotes and the philosophy that guided his radio and television shows:

  • “I love asking questions. I’ve been doing it all my life. When I was 9 years old, I asked the bus driver, ‘Why do you want to drive a bus?’ And I’m still doing that, ‘Why do you want to drive a bus?’”
  • “Every day of my life is a learning experience, and I’m fascinated by everything. My curiosity in all those years has never dimmed since I was a little kid. I like interviewing weathermen – ‘Where does weather begin?’ I’ve asked that question to weathermen – you know the answer? West Africa. All weather begins in West Africa.”
  • “I never learned anything while I was talking.”
  • “If I’m going to learn, I must do it by listening.”
  • “The key to interviewing is listening. If you don’t listen, you’re not a good interviewer. I hate interviewers who come with a long list of prepared questions, because they’re going to depend on going from the fourth question to the fifth question without listening to the answer. … I concentrate solely on the answer, and I trust my instincts to come up with more questions.”
  • “Simple questions are the best. Because when you think—I watch some of these press conferences, and the question takes longer than the answer.”
  • When Larry King was asked “What’s the best interview question?”  He responded, “’Why?’ is the greatest question because you can’t answer it in one word, and it forces the other person to think.”
  • “‘What happened?’ That’s the simplest question in the world. ‘Why’d you do this?’ ‘What happened?’”
  • “When the Gulf War was on, and we would have guests on every night associated with the war: writers, politicians, generals. And I always asked the same question: ‘What happened today?’ I wasn’t there. You were there. You were covering it. ‘What happened?’ That’s the simplest question in the world. ‘Why’d you do this?’  ‘What happened?’”
  • “If you’re the Prime Minister of Great Britain, and you get up in the morning, your first few questions should be: ‘What happened?’ ‘Why?’ ‘How is this happening?’ And you don’t know – you have to learn. We’re all learning. We’re learning every day.”
  • “I never use the word ‘I’ when I interview someone.  I think it’s irrelevant.”
  • “I don’t pretend to know it all. Not, ‘What about Geneva or Cuba? ′ I ask, ‘Mr. President, what don’t you like about this job? ′ Or ‘What’s the biggest mistake you made? ′ That’s fascinating.”
  • “When I ask a question, it’s almost like I’m saying, ‘Help me.’ I think basically that’s what we’re all doing: ‘help me understand.’”
  • “I love doing what I do. I love asking questions. I love being in the mix.”
  • “You cannot talk to people successfully if they think you are not interested in what they have to say, or you have no respect for them.”
  • “Listen to the answer because the answer can often give you the next question.”
  • “The secret of success is an absolute ungovernable curiosity.”
  • “It is the interviewee that is the story, not the interviewer. Your job is to put the ball on the tee and let the interviewee knock it out of the park. That’s why you should ask simple-but-specific questions about the interviewee in their moment.”
  • “I start very simple. ‘What is it like to pitch in the World Series?’ Then I follow up. The most important question is not the first one, it’s the follow up. That’s where the honesty is.”
  • “Even when they give you some kind of canned answer, you ask, ‘Why? Or Why not?’ Then it becomes a real conversation.”
  • “The first rule of my speaking is: listen!”
  • “The worst way to ask a question is by making a long, rambling statement, then asking the panelist ‘what do you think of that?’”
  • “Remember, asking questions is the secret of good conversation. I’m curious about everything, and if I’m at a cocktail party, I often ask my favorite question: ‘Why?’ If a man tells me that he and his family are moving to another city: ‘Why?’ A woman is changing jobs: ‘Why?’ Someone roots for the Mets: ‘Why?’ On my television show, I probably use this word more than any other. It’s the greatest question ever asked, and it always will be. And it is certainly the surest way of keeping a conversation lively and interesting.”
  • “I just love asking questions. I love people. It’s in my DNA. I’m cursed – and blessed.”

What value do you see in asking questions? Are you in the habit of telling or asking?

Powerful Questions as the Feedback Process

Among the responsibilities of leadership are the development of the team and enabling the development of team members. Providing effective feedback is a crucial part of this growth and development within an organization. Feedback provides the means of encouraging and increasing positive behaviors and actions and discouraging or eliminating negative behaviors and actions. In a previous article we described the Three Steps of Effective Feedback as the following:

  • Identify the specific action, behavior, event, or process.
  • Describe the impact of the action.
  • Set the expectations for future action, behavior, events, or processes.

We often think of feedback as something that we present to the recipient in the form of statements or critique. But feedback in the form of powerful questions can be just as effective or even more effective when done well. Using powerful questions as feedback has the advantages of –

  • Prompting reflective or deep thinking regarding actions and behaviors on the part of the recipient.
  • Drawing these perceptions out of the recipient into the light of day and into conversation.
  • Developing ownership of the impact of these actions and behaviors and the action plan on the part of the recipient.

On the other hand, feedback in the form of powerful questions can be challenging. Providing feedback well is a skill that must be developed. Asking powerful questions is also a skill requiring significant growth in most people. Putting these two together, effective feedback and powerful questions, now represents a formidable development process for many leaders. Yet, the benefit can be well worth the effort required to learn and build these habits.

To demonstrate, let’s look at a possible feedback session after a team member has presented to the group. The conversation might look like the following:

Leader: “Thanks for the presentation. I appreciate the effort that you put in on this project.”

(Always good to start with some affirmation to build rapport.)

Leader: “Could we process together how this presentation went? Do you have some time now or should we schedule some time later today?”

(Good to give the recipient some decision-making power but still making it clear that we are going to have a feedback conversation.)

Leader: “What were some of the most effective parts of the presentation?”

(Start with the positives. Notice that we don’t use “you” or “your,” we are examining the presentation and then, perhaps, the process.)

Leader: “What else?” or “What was effective about that?”

(Depending on the recipient’s proclivity to think deep and share those thoughts, we want to find several good elements and the impact that they made. The answers to powerful questions should often prompt curiosity and more questions, such as “Tell me more about___.”)

Leader: “I thought that the three slides on ___ clarified the decision for me and I thought it brought the team together.”

(Good idea to provide some affirmation in the form of impact. The feedback session need not be only questions, but includes also some conversation.)

Leader: “What worked well in the process of putting this presentation together?”

(Here we are looking for some critique of the process of gathering information, preparing the presentation, or organizing the meeting, if it hasn’t already been mentioned.)

Leader: “What in the presentation might have been handled differently?”

(Looking for areas for improvement without coming across as too judgmental.)

Leader: “I am curious, for you personally what do you see as victories and challenges about this presentation and the process of preparing it?”

(In a climate of growth and development, we can ask a personal question to identify the growth achieved and the development needs that cropped up.)

Leader: “How will this presentation and the process of preparing affect the next time, when you are faced with a similar opportunity?”

(Just as in a feedback session where the leader is providing the feedback, the goal of feedback is always about shaping the future. If the recipient doesn’t see the same needs regarding future behavior, the leader may need to make them clear in the form of statements, since powerful questions cannot be leading or manipulative.)

Leader: “In the future, how can I support you in projects such as this?”

(Without taking responsibility for the tasks of others, express support and availability for future efforts.)

Such a feedback session shouldn’t come out of the blue. Feedback always works best when in the context of periodic conversations and when built on a relationship of trust and respect. These fundamentals are true for a coaching relationship also. When done well, a feedback session based on powerful questions further builds this relationship of trust and respect. It is a part of a team effort between the leader and the recipient to further the growth and development of the team member.

What other questions might you ask in such a feedback session or how might you word them differently? What skills are you developing to provide this type of feedback?